Please look at my intellect not my ass. Thank You.

So I had to take this Women's Empowerment course this semester. First thought. Crap. I don't want to take this. I really didn't. I mean I've never been the whole feminist empowerment lets go hit those men over the head type. There are certain issues like education and the role of women in the job force that I have several strong opinions about but overall I'm fine. A guy is more than welcome to pay the bill. Yes he may buy me everything that glitters and put in me in a decent house. Thats not greed. Its common sense. Anyways over the past few weeks that class I once considered silly has slowly crept up on me and *sigh its grown on me. I actually *GASP* enjoy the class. I think what has happen is that the message of what feminism is, is changing. No its not about burning your bras and letting your underarm hair grow ( but if that is your thing then go right ahead). No its about demanding and having respect from society while at the same time being you, a woman.

So the other day we watched "Telephone" by Lady Gaga

WTH

WTF

WITW (What in the world)

I mean seriously. This is the women that practically half or our nations adolescents look up to. A crazy woman in raw meat outfits parading around in the "Pussy Wagon". What kind of message does this get out into the world? I'm not some sort of prude believe me far from it but seriously are there are still artists out there who can give the public their does of sexy yet have a message at the same time. Look at Rihanna. Her song with Emmenim "Love the Way you Lie" Brilliant. First of all Megan Fox is in the video and she's hot. No joke. She is, its like a fact whether your male or female your can't deny she does posses the hot factor. Anyways Rihanna got the message ac cross while at the same time showing off her awesome legs for all of those people who couldn't live without seeing that sexy side of her. Overall I think her stuff is pretty good and at the same time she manages to retain some of her dignity. Lady Gaga on the other hand I don't get. I mena WHAT MESSAGE IS SHE GETTING OUT INTO THE WORLD!!!I mean I understand she has stood up for the LGBT community and I respect her for that. But other than that what has she really done? This woman is financially solid. What charities has she donated to? Why isn't she working for the United Nations Ambassador coalition? Why isn't she using her platform of influence and power in the world for a broader cause? In fact what is the point of Lady Gaga being present in the pop music world because as we all have seen from Willow Smith a ten year old could do this. I don't know. Lady Gaga pisses me off. period.

On to another topic....

Ishmael Khaldi

He is a IDF solider and basically spoke at a university nearby to me. He claims that Israel's military notions are for a better Israel and Palestine. As a Baudouin Muslim AND solider in the Israeli army her is a "reformed Muslim"

Give me a fucking break.

Reformed Muslim my ass, please excuse my Arabic.The Israeli government has no interest in seeing an independently run ARAB Palestinian state. They have tried to pass a referendum to force at least 20% of the ARAB population residing or should I say captive in Israel to swear sovereignty to Israel and recognize it as a Jewish state. Its a Zionist state and of course Zionist run the world.Get used to it. Anyways it just infuriates me how this government can get away with stealing people homes and separating them from their own families. The crap going on in Iraq and the United States reason for invading is nothing compared to the genocide, yes I said genocide occurring in Palestine. It is a genocide when you cluster people in areas and deny them access to export and import goods. Its genocide when you steal their land, their sovereignty and then cry murder when Hamas retaliates. I'm am no supporter of terrorism don't get me wrong. I fully believe in fact that Bin Laden isn't a true Muslim and he is going to hell. Right along with Israeli politicians who have tried to eradicated Palestinians. Along with Bush who set up this country for decades of debt and woe for this stupid war in Iraq. I support my troops but this ha been carried on for way too long. Anyways this soldiers presence angered me and here I had to blab out on my blog. From feminism to politics. You never know what to expect with me. xoxoxo

Short and sweeter...

Allah is testing me right now. Inshallah I hope all my issues work out. Instead of worrying about what the future holds I'm going to go shopping tomorrow, after I've finished 3 of my papers, to look for an awesome outfit to go the this charity hookah lounge event on Wednesday which I will still go to without skipping class because its just hookah. Not a grade. But And I am going to enjoy it and forget about the future. I need to live it out now.

My lemonade is a little sour right now

So I'm currently experiencing the "college bum out phase". Its a period you go through where you sit down and think "How the hell did I get here oh and everyone is so much smarter than me".Side effects also include random crying sessions and the ice cream at the dinning hall becomes magically becomes the next best thing to coffee Hagen Daz. So I had to drop a math course. Failed the midterm and it was the worst grade I've ever made in my life. Literally. Not trying to sound like I'm a genius or anything but I've never done that bad. So I hop on the campus bus and mentality vow not to cry so I start listening to "Lemonade-Gucci Mane' because well that song is just stupid.period. Well the not cry thing last until I get off the bus and I walk down the main path through our campus bawling( glancing down at my phone pretending to text though whenever people pass by, I don't do public outbursts.) It also happened to be the day when my side of the hall was experiencing a "WE ALL ARE FREAKING HAPPY DAY". So I had to escape to my room and do the ugly cry. That including frantically cleaning my room because I clean when I'm upset.and organize my scarves :). Basically by the end of the day I've realized that first I didn't need the math course and my umi (who is the bomb) reassured me that it would better to drop the course than fail and really butcher my GPA. So here I am. Still bummed though. I miss kindergarten. All you had to do was play nice and eat a cookie. Life.

xoxox.....................

Spazzed out on a stalker, 7-12 page Political Theory Essay but I just stare at the screen......#%%#$^%$#!!!

MEN

You probably won't meet a real one until you hit thirty.But by then they've already spent a whole lifetime perving after other women so what's the point. Sorry but today will be a negative post. An extremely negative post.

What is women ran the world?No I mean seriously not that bullshit with Wonder Woman wearing an outfit two sizes too small or sitting around singing "Girl Power" crap because personally I can't stand that stuff.(I dropped out of Girls Scouts if thats no surprise). What if Saudi was ruled by a queen? Would she sit around and let everyone in the world rob her of her riches or hold it as collateral until she got what she wanted. What if the guys at my college had to take "Men's Leadership" classes instead. Would the class teach them respect,dignity, and honor or would another jackass stand up there and talk about last weeks football game. What if Charlie Brown had been a girl?Well it would have taken over 40 years to kick the damm football. What if it was Alpha "female" instead of alpha male. Wait what does that even mean anyways? The king of fools? Or the fool is a king?

So a few days ago I had to cuss out this erratic Jordanian stalker guy who felt it was his birthright to follow a friend of mine around and pursue after her as if she was the last piece of meat on Earth. The piss taking fact is that as I stood there screaming chaotically at this complete waste of space (yes I said it and yes I meant it), you have these men who could knock me down with a sneeze watching me act like a complete lunatic. Oh yes I despise men. I despise them down to their screwed up chromosomes because at the end of the day they surprise you with conversations you'd never thought you have again( an old friend of mine had a complete convo with me a few days ago and it was relieving that yes, he's grown up, my work is done).

Its kind of crazy. We're living in a world with this big 'ol love/hate dynamic thing going on. If only I stopped meeting all the ones I hate.

Short and Sweet

Had a busy night so very short post.Check out this artist "Feroz". Really good and original sound.

I told someone I didn't wan to wear white to my wedding,*gasp was the answer

So I don't know why but a little idea has been running in my head for a while. The idea consists of twelve hour flight accompanied by endless trips to the governmental building to renew a student visa and paying tuition at The American University of Cairo and managing the finances of a flat while remaining um tempted to throw a flat party because well no one is there to tell you not to.Yep.I'm thinking about moving back to Egypt. Don't get me wrong I love it here.Really I'm enjoying college and so far everything is working out the way at least I think Allah wants it.Its just something is missing.It been missing for a while.My freedom.I remember days when I could leave the house and venture out to the souk behind our apartment building and stroll the streets watching the locals go about their daily routines. I remember my last day in Cairo how I purposely got on a random bus and got lost just to enjoy that feeling of I don't know being apart of a bigger dynamic in the world. I hearing the ahdan sooooooo much wallahi.Wow it is the most beautiful thing to wake up for fagr with 5 different mosques surrounding your apartment building calling the ahdan at different pitches at different times which are only about a second off. Ramadan is nothing like here.Over there you don't just go through Ramadan you LIVE Ramadan.Also once you get over the whole pollution and other random crap we Westerners overemphasize about because we're just that dam spoiled, you might be blessed with the view of the pyramids right from your balcony window. Or waking up at 2 AM and hearing shouts of awe from all of the people in your building because its beginning to rain(which happens like once or twice a year lol) and the minute you open the balcony door and step out on the cold concrete a bolt of diamond white lightning streaks the pitch blue sky in front of you and you stand looking in awe half out of fear and amazement. I feel bad I haven't had these moments here in my own country of USA.I mean I will always love NYC(lol another clue towards my location :).I don't just love this city I fucking obsess about it. This place always sends this rush of excitement whenever I'm walking through the African Marts on 116th of gazing up at the powerful yet intimidating buildings down near Wall Street. When I was a little girl I wanted to be the princess of New York City, and no not in that vain Gossip Girl way no I wanted to be powerful enough one day to share the love this city has brought to me back to its people. If falling in love was is powerful as it has been with theses places then it is unimaginable what this heart can handle. So we'll see. I'll fill out an application today. I'll also fill out on for NYU AD. Allah has guided me well so far, I'm always anticipating what is next.
xoxoxo

Playlist of Life

Whoa two posts in two days lucky me :) Well yesterday I'm eating dinner with my girls and suddenly "Sk8ter Boi" by Avril Lavinge comes on and we all give each other theses looks like "AHH I remember this song!!" I remember this song when I was at that awkward stage where I could no longer play with the boys and words like"period",PMS, period,hijab(even though it took me a while to completely cover),and just the terrible thirteens or twelves rolled through my life. But yes I remember this song. So here is my current playlist of life, what is rolling around in my ipod......

1. Pursuit of Happiness- Kid Cudi

Ok I'm sorry whoever this offends but this is my straight up shisha song. And my rainy day song I love the tone and everything.It just reminds me of that fuzzy area throughout senior year in high school when I realized this is it I'm off to bigger.harder, and inshallah better things :)

2.Teenage Dream-Katy Perry

I >

3. Down on Me- Jerimih ft 50 cent

LOL this song cracks me up because a good friend of mine that I've met here at uni and I guess learning first that she's lived in Saudi for the past three years I would have never imagined she would know music like this. But you can't judge a girl by her zip code ;) This reminds all of the awesome things I've done her so far at uni and the more to come :)

4. Again- Bruno Mars and Natasha Bedingfield

This song is beautiful. It is unique(finally) and it brings tears to my eyes. This song reminds me of all the things I've wanted to say to people(the good things) and just never did.If I could I would do it again.

5.Ah we Nous- Nancy Agram

Ok so this reminds me of Egypt straight up, yes I lived there a while and wow "mafeesh haga teegi kida ida habibi kida?" :) I love it there.

6. Apologize- One Republic

And this one reminds me of all the apologies I meant to give but never did. This song also reminds me to never live with regrets. Do and say what you can today because tomorrow is never promised. ie------> THIS BLOG!

7.Only Girl in the World-Rihanna

Finally this girl comes out with something that wont depress us anymore :) This song is my life right now. More to come later........

8. About a Girl-Sugagbabes

this song reminds me of the first time I scored a goal for my football(soccer) team in middle school. Even though it came out years later this is the feeling I get when I listen to it,awesomeness...

ahh my friend is here for our weekly meet up, she's a pre-med so her time is very limited :( until next time xoxoxoxoxoxo